Day 06- Write 30 interesting facts about yourself.

Okay so considering I don’t want to write 30 interesting facts about myself, I will hand over the honors to my best friend Sean Gerald Maloney :)

1 she enjoys singing

2 for some reason in hell she gets hired everywhere she applies. 

3 her butt is fucking awesome 

4 she talks to animals

5 taking back sunday is her favorite band

6 she wants to fuck tyler the creator

7 she likes to skateboard

8 she has a shit ton of toms and moccasins and shit

9 she smokes ciggs

10 she always wears a red lumberjack hat at my house

11 shes fixing my tumblr

12 she skips 3rd period all the time

13 shes bipolar

14 she has bad anxiety 

15 she has a gnar tattoo of a nautical star

16 she wants more tattoos. like 8 more. 

17 shes fuckin crazy

18 she doesnt care too much about what people think about her

19 she only smokes newports 

20 her birthday is valentines day

21 she skates in uggs?

22 she curses a lot

23 shes a C cup

24 shes learning how to dance

25 shes had three different cars before she had her license 

26 she almost lives at my house

27 id fuck her

28 nigga you just went full retard. 

29 catcher in the rye is one of her fave books

30 she has a dog with like adhd or something. 

Day 04 - Your views on religion.

I’m agnostic. If you don’t know what that means, here is the definition.

That is the textbook definition.

My definition is believing in a higher power, yet not conforming to religion.

In my belief, there is a God. Yet, I don’t feel the need to go to church to worship him. I don’t feel a need to conform to a religion because faith is more powerful. I let my faith have control, instead of a religion.

I don’t go to church, I’ve gone maybe 4 times in my whole life. I never liked it. People love to say they’re religious, that God and Jesus are their saviors, yet they break all of the rules. Their hypocritical. I refuse to conform to a religion because I know I’d be one of those hypocrites.

My faith is stronger than a religion. 

I tried to kill myself last year, in May. May, 2011.

God, was there and saved me. I believe so. Because I prayed to end my madness.

And when I was on that window ledge, I had a panic attack that stopped me. And i’m sure it was God’s way of telling me no, I love you and I will take you when the time is right.

God isn’t going to let everything be roses and butterflies and your life, people.

Just have some faith, live your life, and he will help you when you need it.

Day 03 - Your views on drugs and alcohol.

Alright well, this will be a lengthy one, guys and girls who would like to listen.

I grew up in a home where drugs and alcohol were abused regularly, by my father. The story of my father, the drugs he abused, and how he is doing is a story for another time, but let me just say he has been drug free for 7 years and sober from alcohol for three. Mind you, he made mistakes, and I never stopped loving him, ever. I forgave him for everything.

Being the person that I am, I feel that you always deserve a chance to better things. We, as humans, make mistakes. That’s a part of life, making mistakes. When I was a kid, speaking of my father’s drug addictions was unspeakable. I thought it was a bad thing to come from a broken home. I was ashamed to tell people that my father was a crackhead, that he was depressed, that he was present, but not mentally. 

But what hurt more than that, was my father was dying. Psychically and mentally.

What people neglect to understand about drug addicts is the amount of pain THEIR going through. Sure, it hurt so much to watch my dad stumble down a broken road, but I will never forget looking into his eyes, and seeing a hunger for substance, and a complete emptiness for living unless he was being fueled by his demons.

I wasn’t so much ashamed of my father, more disappointed in myself for not being able to do a damn thing to stop it. I fucking love that man, and I did everything a small child could to stop him from ending his life.

Imagine being 7 years old and trying to figure out a way to stop your father from shooting himself?

Not easy, my friends.

I guess what I’m trying to say is, drugs and alcohol, were a blessing in my life. My father is now a happy, clean man. I can look into his eyes and see a reason to live.

I learned a hard lesson, and I steer clear of drugs and alcohol, but I feel blessed to have experienced those demons that belonged to my father.

Because if I never experienced them the way I did, maybe it could been me in my father’s shoes.

So before you judge him, realize that addiction is fucking hard. Don’t do the drugs, and you wont get addicted. and never make fun of an addict, because that’s stupid as fuck.

Day 01 - Your current relationship, if single discuss how single life is.

Well, I am single. And I really do love it. For the longest time (yes, I am only 17) I struggled with relationships, I still do. So, I’m giving myself a break. :) And hopefully, I do fall in love, or even in like, one day. I’ve been cheated on, yeah, but why do I care? He wasn’t the one. I’ve been left for an ex, but does it hurt? No, because I wasn’t the one, and I guess that means neither was he.

And I’ve broken hearts, but do I mind? Not so much anymore, because it was what was right for ME. Sometimes being a little selfish can show you what you REALLY need in life. I’d rather enjoy a relaxing day alone, or a crazy day with friends before committing to something that makes me so uncomfortable I can’t breathe.

Why do we rush so heavily into things anyway? What happened to just dating not “going out”, but going on A DATE? Where did all this “talking” bull come from? What happened to taking things slow, and being friends before lovers?

You do what you want, but I’m gonna enjoy the single life till Mr.Right comes swinging by :)